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"Mad Cow" Arrives In AmericaPresident Bush vows to find out what has the cows so upset
Mad cow disease has long plagued the British livestock industry but U.S. ranchers had so far escaped the disease. As a result, not much is known about the disease by the average American. The President was vacationing at his ranch in Crawford, Texas, when news of the disease broke. President Bush, a long-time friend of the cattle ranchers, vowed to do whatever is necessary to prevent the spread of the disease. "We're going to be forming a committee to learn more about why the cows are so upset," said Bush, speaking without prepared remarks. "Back when I was young, we used to sneak up on them at night and push them over. We called it 'cow tipping.' It could be that the cow in question was mad about being tipped once too often." Agriculture Secretary Ann Veneman believes the risks of the disease are overrated. Veneman then announced that she planned on serving beef at all her holiday parties this season. "It was one cow," said Veneman, "and it came from Canada." Indeed, the cow's Canadian origins are straining American-Canadian relations, with some congressmen calling for a ban on all Canadian imports.
Regardless of the extent of the threat from the infection of a single cow, it is the meat industry that will utlimately bear the economic burdens of international bans on U.S. products. It's a case where rumor and speculation cause public concern, which prompts foreign governments to enact the bans. "For years, the meat industry has resisted tougher regulations on how livestock and meat are inspected," said Senator Hilary Clinton (D-N.Y.). "Now, they're paying the price and bill is going to be pretty steep." |
The dreaded "mad cow" disease surfaced in the United States for the first time, when a Washington cow tested positive for the disease. The news has caused shockwaves in the meat industry, as numerous foreign countries announced embargos of American beef.
"No more Canadian bacon or ice hockey," said House Majority Leader Tom DeLay (R-Tex.). "And I'm all for doing away with singing the Canadian anthem at baseball games too."